Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Myths about Circumcision You Likely Believe

Yesterday a friend of mine shared an article about circumcision.  I was surprised to see that she posted it since she circumcised her son.  This is what she had to say:

"Great article, the best I've ever read. Its very long, 6 parts but well worth the read. As the mother of a circumcised boy I tend to avoid these kinds of articles like the plague because I don't like people making me feel bad about a decision I made because I felt it was in my child's best interests. 

But as a parent I'm always trying to improve myself when it comes to things like carseat safety and parenting method. I always find myself learning more and more about what I'm doing wrong and I love learning so I can be a better parent for D and to my future children, so why would I not want to learn more about circumcision? Because there is soooo much conflicting information! This site says its best to not circumcise, this site says that site is lying that circumcision is best, this site... says that they are both laying and you should only cut off half... you get the gist. 

So once I made what I felt was an informed decision I stuck with it and didn't want to read anymore about it or watch any videos to make me feel the pain I felt when I handed Derek off to the surgeon, because what mother would want to relive that? I hoped I'd never have another boy so I didn't have to battle myself about this decision again, and I knew that if I had been a single parent D would still be intact because without Hubby wanting the circumcision I couldn't have done it, even if it had been for the best. 

But something urged me to read this article and I did, then I made Hubby (my stubborn husband who is very VERY pro circumcision) read it and we've come to the decision that we aren't going to circumcise any more of our children. So please just read this, it is chalk full of information and has actual references =)"

I applaud my friend of taking the plunge to find out more information.  I know it's not easy to learn the truth, but it is so important to try to continue to learn and to grow so we can be the best people and parents we can be.

Before i ever became pregnant my husband and i had decided that if we were to ever have a boy that they would be circumcised.  We felt that way because my husband is circumcised and because i thought that was just what you did.  I feel stupid now for begin so ignorant.   It was when my sister was pregnant with her first that she first introduced the idea of NOT circumcising to me.  I didn't even really realize that was an option! (again, i feel so stupid that i thought that)  I started to do my real research and i was blown away by everything i did not know.  I was so THANKFUL that i had found this information out before we ever had a son.  It pains me to think of the pain we would have inflicted on our child just so they could 'look like his father' and because i though that's what you were supposed to do.  Circumcision is something you can never take back.  Once it is done it is done.  I now believe it is a choice that should be up to the person who owns that body part.  The foreskin serves a purpose.  I'm amazed at how much i have learned about this piece of skin.  I am sad that my husband did not have the choice when it came to his penis and i am sad for the impact it has had in both his *and* my life because his parents were given the wrong information and did not seek to learn more.  I'm sad that i did not know growing up that my own father and brothers are uncircumcised and that i did not grow up knowing that was normal.  Again, i am so thankful that *i* did learn more and that our views have changed.   If my views can change, if my friends views can change why can't yours?

What are you afraid of?  Knowledge is power and it is only when we know better that we do better.  By choosing not to do your research you are choosing to be ignorant and that can cause more harm that you know.

I want to share this article with you and to urge you to read it, no matter what your view point on circumcision is.  You never know how you will truly feel until you finally receive all the facts.  It might hurt to read this article if you have already circumcised your child but remember, when you know better you can do better.  And even i learned some things from this article, so everyone can benefit from reading it.

I love this quote from the article:
As parents, we are entrusted by God or the universe or by nature with the care of our babies.  They truly are a gift, but one that we do not get to keep.  We have a responsibility to care for them as best as we can, because they cannot speak nor care for themselves.  Though they are babies now, and we have to make decisions for them, they will be adults, with minds and feelings of their own.  We need to make decisions for them that we will be proud to stand behind now and in the future.  If your son asks you why you had him circumcised, how will you answer?  "Because I am circumcised and I needed your penis to match mine?"  "Because I didn't trust you to be able to make your own decisions?"  When making this decision for your son, be brutally honest with yourself.  What does your decision serve: the child's rights, or your ego?"

And with that, will you be the bigger person and learn more?

Myths about Circumcision You Likely Believe

(This article can be a tad confusing to follow.  You'll read the first part by following this link and then you click on each of the next parts (2-6) to read the other points)

EDIT:  My friend decided to create her own blog to she could share your opinions and views and she started with her story of her son's circumcision and her journey to finding out the truth.  You can read it here: http://hippie-mommy.blogspot.com/2011/12/how-i-changed-my-view-on-circumcision.html

1 comment:

Hannah said...

I had seen that series of articles, it's very complete and seems quite factual. Glad I ran across this type of information before I had my boys. I had to go looking for it, though, I didn't hear it from doctors, friends, or family.

Now I'm working to get my Christian medical sharing organization (like insurance but not technically) to stop covering it as part of maternity care. It's a member-governed organization with elections on various issues/changes several times a year, so I really want to get it on the ballot. It doesn't cover any other cosmetic procedures (or even "preventative", for those that believe it to prevent something-or-other). I haven't got a response to any of my e-mails yet...but I'm going to keep trying. I don't want my money going towards it and one of the reasons I joined this program was to keep money from going towards things I don't agree with or want to help pay for.