Thursday, October 14, 2010


Hello and welcome to my personal blog!
I felt it was time for me to go out on my own and create a place for me to share my latest projects, articles and links i find interesting, and a place for me to share my thoughts on things i find important.

I hope you find this blog educational and insperational.

Now for a quick introduction. I am 23 years old and have been married to my significant other for about 3 and 1/2 years now (He is almost 26). We have 2 daughters. Our first had Bilateral Multicystic Kidney Disease and died shortly after she was born. Our second daughter is a month old. Our family is of the LDS faith. We try to be thrifty and love to save as much as we can. We are also a little more "crunchy" in the sense that we had a midwife assisted home birth for our second daughter, we cloth diaper, baby-wear, bedshare, delay/selective vax, extend rear-face, extend breastfeed, we are against circumcision, and against spanking. I am also trying to go more "green" with our family. Personally, i love to be creative and craft as much as i can. A new hobby is decorating cakes and cupcakes.

I think that will do for now for an introduction.

(you may have noticed i haven't used any names. I do NOT want to use my family's names in this blog. I still need to come up with some nicknames for everyone, but i'm pretty sure my husband will be known as The Hubby and our second daughter will probably be Little Rainbow. But i'll let you know. Please do not use any of my family's names in your comments. Thank you!)

Now, onto a post.
Yesterday i read a blog post at Single Dad Laughing called The Disease Called "Perfection" and The Cure for "Perfection". These posts really hit me hard. His posts really got me thinking (as do all the posts i've read of his so far). He talks about how perfection plauges us all. He talks about how perfection destorys peoples lives. He talks about how we need to be REAL to those around us and stop letting perfection control our lives.

Like i said above, this hit me hard. Lately i've been struggling with "being real". I've struggled with saying exactly what's on my mind, and how how i feel. Why is this?

It's because i have one deep fear.
The fear of rejection.

My whole life i have wanted others to like me. I NEEDED to be liked. But why? Why is it so imporant to me? I honestly don't know. But i'm trying really hard not to let what OTHERS think control me. Why should i care? Why should i let the fear of what others will think of me control my thoughts and actions?

I need to be REAL to myself and stop caring.
I know it will not be easy, but i will do my best.

And so, a fair warning. I may say things on my blog "others" do not want to hear. But i have to be real to myself and that means telling the truth.

so here we go. I hope you enjoy the ride with me.


Megan R. said...

Jillyn, (it's okay to use your name, right? You have it on the top left) It is amazing how much we are alike. I struggle with the same issue - fear of rejection. I also care way too much what others think of me and my thoughts/opinions. I am working on myself too.
I am glad you've started a personal blog and I look forward to following your journey.

Jillyn said...

Thanks Meagan! Yas, it is ok to use my name, just not the rest of the family's. I'm trying not to go into too many details since i'm keeping this blog public. :)

And i'm really excited about this blog!

Krista said...

I fear rejection, but expect it at the same time. Actually, I feel like I deserve it. So the fact that others think I'm a great person never rings true with me, because I feel as though I'm not worth much. Make sense? Probably...

Sigh. Well, I *am* very happy that you've started this public yet very personal blog. Let the fun begin!

C'Maya said...

Jillyn! I love it! this post is SO good! Im glad that your blog is going to be open and 'raw'. Mine is too. I love that the filters arent there and its just the little nuances of you that come out! :)

Jillyn said...

Krista: i completely understand....

C'maya: I'm glad to hear you're open too!